Taking a step forward
by DiePi
Summary: But... if Hikaru opened his eyes and wanted to take a step forward... What should I do' HikaxKao Rated T for YAOI Twincest.


This is my first ever fiction in Ouran High School Host Club. As you can guess, my favorites are the Hitachiin twins (Yes, it's twincest but I don't care and if you do, you shouldn't be reading this). It's set after the Halloween episode in anime, which is episode 21. Hope you enjoy, let me know what you thought of it.

Disclaimer: I don't own Ouran High School Host Club or the twins, if I did, I would make the twins do $#&# and !$&#$ and $&$# and !#&(( and ……………………….. (List goes on)

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**Taking a step forward by Heuk Ya**

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'But…… if one day, Hikaru opens his eyes and thinks that he wants to take a step forward…… Then…… Then what should I do……..?' 

-Host Club now opened-

"And then Kaoru ran straight at me, crying that now he's lost 20 times in a row and that I should help him……"

"Hikaru!!! ……….Don't be so mean…….. I was really upset at the time, you know………….."

Kaoru, playing the distressed uke to Oscar level, lowered his gaze with few tears in his eyes. His cheeks were tinged with just right amount of pink and he bit his lower lip as if trying to stop himself from bursting into tears.

"Kaoru……"

Even with his eyes on the floor, Kaoru could sense the girls holding their breath. Kaoru smirked inwardly. Then his twin's hands came round, cupping his cheeks and gently lifting his head. Hikaru's thumbs brushed across his eyes, wiping off the tears, Hikaru's golden eyes locked with the identical pair of eyes belonging to his soft spoken twin.

"Kaoru…… I'm sorry…….. You just looked so sweet at the time……. I didn't mean to make you cry, you know I can't stand seeing you crying……… It breaks my heart………."

Kaoru clutched his hands around Hikaru's shirt, snuggling even closer into Hikaru's warm embrace.

"Hikaru………"

That was the limit the girls could take. One had fainted, the other now slipping in and out of consciousness. Hikaru and Kaoru shared knowing glances between them at the success of their act then Hikaru noticed it. Kaoru's golden eyes were darkened to amber with something Hikaru couldn't tell what it was and Kaoru's clenched hands stayed at his shirt just few seconds longer than they had planned.

'……..Kaoru……?'

Kaoru, returning to greet the next pair of girls, cursed himself inwardly. Ever since the Halloween, his worries wouldn't leave him alone, however much he told himself they were unfounded and he had nothing to worry about.

Would _Tono_'s spell break?

Yes, Kaoru thought.

When would it break?

I don't know, Kaoru thought.

What should I do when Hikaru wants to take that step forward?

……………I don't know, Kaoru thought.

Just the thought itself was enough to bring tears to his eyes. Kaoru may be the philosophical, thoughtful and only one who can calm Hikaru down, but Hikaru was the one who had strength to go forward into the unknown territory if he wished to. Hikaru would make many mistakes but Kaoru knew he wouldn't even dare to venture outside of their world without Hikaru leading him through it.

For him, Hikaru was his life. He loved all the members of the host club and was really thankful to Tamaki but nobody stood even close to what Hikaru meant to him. Yes, others would probably call it sick that Kaoru harbors such feeling for his own twin, but when had they ever cared what others thought about them?

Kaoru dearly, dearly loved Hikaru, the light of his life. The one who shared everything from birth to this moment with him. Life without Hikaru was unimaginable but with Haruhi's appearance in their life, Kaoru could tell how Hikaru was becoming more open to the outside world. Kaoru let out small sigh.

'Hikaru…… What would you say if you knew what I was thinking…….. what I was feeling………….?'

When Kaoru returned to their table, Hikaru couldn't help but to scowl. He may not be good at reading other people but he knew everything when it came to Kaoru. And Kaoru right now had something big on his mind, sadness was just oozing out from him, seeping into his own mind. Hikaru frowned. He will wait for now, for Kaoru to tell him. For now, that is.

As the days went by, it was becoming obvious to the surprisingly observant third years in the host club that something was bothering Kaoru a lot. And that Hikaru didn't have a clue what it was about.

"Takashi, do you think we should talk to Kaoru?"

"………………"

Mori looked at Kaoru and Hikaru in another of their brotherly love act again and couldn't help but to notice just how longing yet sad Kaoru looked. It wasn't the act of distressed uke. Kaoru seemed to be afraid of losing his twin but……. Was that something possible to even think about when it was THE Hitachiin twins they were talking about? Mori looked back at Hunny who had stopped half way through a huge cake in front of him.

"…………..Hikaru will act in time."

At Takashi's calm reply, Hunny looked at the twins again then returned to his cake. If Takashi thought they would be fine, the twins would probably be fine at the end.

Hikaru was now irritated more than worried. Although absolutely nothing in Kaoru's behavior when with others had changed, he couldn't miss small signs his twins showed unconsciously. He was blanking out during his reading time, his eyes darkened with unknown sadness.

At night, Kaoru would snuggle close to Hikaru (which wasn't unusual) then wrap his arm around Hikaru's waist tightly and bury his face in his neck. It was like those times when they were young, when their parents tried to separate them into different beds at night. The two were so afraid that the parents would put them apart while they were asleep that two would hold each other tightly in their arms.

And Hikaru KNEW Kaoru wasn't sleeping much. Kaoru always slept less than Hikaru, going to bed later than himself, but now Kaoru was up long before Hikaru got up. Dark circle was beginning to form around Kaoru's eyes and when he saw Kaoru asleep in Hunny's couch in the third music room, Hikaru decided it was high time he finds out what is wrong with his half.

First, collecting information. Hikaru didn't know what was going on, but something told him Kaoru wouldn't give straight answer if he asked him and that Hikaru only has to say right words to him to clear this up. Hikaru, although may not be as philosophical and thoughtful as his twin, did have good intuition (although it seemed to work only for his twin). So he went to the only person he could think of, who would give him some realistic advice.

"Haruhi!! Haruhi!!"

"Hikaru? Where's Kaoru?"

"Well….. I need to talk to you about Kaoru."

"Eh?"

"Have you noticed Kaoru's bit……. Off these days?"

"Hmmm…… Well, he seems bit tired……. Why?"

"………I…… Well……."

Hikaru suddenly didn't know what to say. He had never had to ask someone else about his twin. After all, they were THE Hitachiin twins in their own world, they knew everything about each other. Thankfully, Haruhi seemed to notice this and changed her question.

"When did it begin?"

"Halloween. I think it's something to do with me but I can't really think of anything I might have done to upset him."

"I think it's impossible for you to upset him by doing something… even when you guys fight, it's all under an act."

"But I just know it, I know it's to do with me."

"…….Hmm. Well, Kaoru is always the one who does thinking. Did he say anything unusual?"

"He doesn't say anything……… It's just little things he does……… And he's definitely not sleeping much……………… Wait…"

"??"

Now that Hikaru thought about it, there was one odd moment with Kaoru on the day after Halloween.

-Nice mood, right? Just as I thought, the magic of magical wagon does not continue forever.-

-What are you on about?-

-…………..Well, I guess it's okay yet if you still ran to me first in that situation……-

-Huh?-

-Nothing, nothing.-

Kaoru had looked at him a little odd that time. And what was that about magic of the wagon? Kaoru could be philosophical in his speech and it did usually take awhile for Hikaru to understand what he was saying, though this time, he was still lost.

"Hikaru, don't you get it?"

"Get what?"

"Kaoru is afraid of … well, this whole thing disappearing."

"Huh?"

"This is first time you guys sort of interacted with the world outside of your own, right? And you are getting along with other people and stuff. I think Kaoru is afraid what he has now would disappear, like wagon's magic. Like, the host club which got you guys here. And, maybe even losing you."

"Me? Where the hell would I go without him?"

"Well… Kaoru is definitely better than you at getting along with others but I sometimes see how insecure he feels when you are not around. The brotherly love act you do at host club may be just an act but you really are the only he feels safe to be somewhere outside of your own world."

Hikaru stared at Haruhi. Did Kaoru really think he would leave his half behind? He didn't know what to think. He was glad to know he was that important to Kaoru but to think Kaoru ever even doubted him like that…….

"Hikaru."

"I'm going to talk to Kaoru."

"Yeah… but…"

When Hikaru stopped and turned around, Haruhi couldn't decide how to say or even whether say the words. She had noticed how much Hikaru meant to Kaoru and had wondered for some time whether the act was really just an act. At least from Kaoru's point of view anyway. But was it really her place to say something about it? After all, she wasn't even sure of it.

"……..Just……….. try to……… see behind."

Hikaru just looked at her for a minute then sped off to the third music room. See behind? Behind what? When he had reached the music room, Kaoru was still asleep, turning around under Hunny's blanket (which obviously didn't cover Kaoru much). Hikaru walked up to the couch and sat on the floor next to it.

Kaoru's brown hair was splashed out on red velvet and his white skin was shining in the sunlight pouring in through the huge windows. Hikaru smiled and gently placed his hand on Kaoru's soft cheek. Then Kaoru's eyes fluttered opened and golden eyes found his identical pair.

"Hey."

Kaoru whispered with soft smile on his face. Hikaru loved Kaoru's voice and his smile. Kaoru's voice was slightly higher pitched than his, and a lot softer. His smile had less wickedness in it than his. Just like his Kaoru. Just as he thought those words, something struck him. See behind.

Hikaru smiled.

"Hey."

Hikaru kept his eyes locked with Kaoru's then replaced his hand on the cheek with his lips. He felt Kaoru stiffen under him then relax again. Hikaru continued to administer soft kisses along Kaoru's cheek, forehead and nose. Then just as he was about to kiss the soft lips, Kaoru gently pushed Hikaru away. Ever so gentle. Always. Just like his Kaoru.

"Hikaru……."

"Shhh………… I would never, NEVER leave you alone, Kaoru…………. I couldn't be anywhere without you to watch over me………. If I go anywhere, I'll take you by hand, drag you if I have to. But I'm not going anywhere without you, I'm never leaving your side until I die. Actually, make it even after I die."

Kaoru whose eyes had widened at Hikaru's sincere words chuckled at Hikaru's last words. Hikaru smiled too then taking his chance while Kaoru had his eyes closed, pressed his lips lightly against Kaoru's. Kaoru's eyes shot open again, looking into Hikaru's eyes, looking for answer. Hikaru left the sweet, identical lips but hovered closely and whishpered.

"……….I love you too much to leave you ever."

Kaoru's eyes widened again. Kaoru always knew what Hikaru truly meant by his words. And Kaoru knew what Hikaru truly meant by those words. It wasn't brotherly love. It was real love. For him. Hitachiin Hikaru, the light of his life, had just confessed his love to him.

Kaoru's eyes started to fill up with tears involuntarily. Hikaru, with a rare gentle smile on his face, wiped the tears from Kaoru's eyes. Even though they were born pranksters, Kaoru could be so soft sometimes. That was his Kaoru.

"Hikaru……."

Kaoru, still lying down, wrapped his arm around Hikaru's neck and pulled him closer. Hikaru let himself to be pulled in then with his head still hovering just above Kaoru's, stood up to position himself above his twin on the couch.

"You idiot. You worry about something unthinkable."

"You are right."

Kaoru chuckled again with tearful eyes. Hikaru playfully smacked his twin's head then just as Kaoru opened his mouth to complain, Hikaru firmly pressed his lips to the petal soft lips. He wondered if his own was so soft and sweet like Kaoru's.

Their lips met then Hikaru's pink tongue came knocking on Kaoru's lips. Tightening his hold around Hikaru's neck, Kaoru opened his lips to let his twin's tongue in. Kaoru felt relief and tension running through his body at same time.

Then the kiss ended. Still only few centimeters away, hot breaths were ghosting over each other's face. Then the words were spoken.

"I, Hitachiin Hikaru, hereby swear on my soul that I would never leave my love, Hitachiin Kaoru, on his own even after death."

Kaoru's golden eyes found the same eyes looking back at him and saw the sincerity in them. Kaoru smiled and placed his hands on Hikaru's white cheeks.

"I, Hitachiin Kaoru, hereby swear on my soul that I would never leave my love, Hitachiin Hikaru, on his own even after death."

Both of them cracked an identical smile, but it wasn't the usual evil-scheme-in-plan smile. It was full of love and happiness. Then with another light kiss on the lips, Hikaru gathered Kaoru in his arm, patting his back.

"Go back to sleep, Kaoru. You haven't slept well for ages. It would be awhile before Host Club opens anyway, Kyoya-senpai said Mori-senpai and Hunny-senpai were going to be late because of some graduation stuff and Tono had to go and meet the school superintendant, so he would open the club bit late today."

"Mmmm…"

Kaoru was already falling asleep with his twin, no, his lover's warmth cocooning him, and gentle rub on his back. And feeling the peck on his forehead, Kaoru was off to the dreamland with smile tugging at his lips.

When the rest of the host club finally arrived at the third music room, they found the twins tightly hugging each other on couch, deeply asleep.

"Wow, the couch is just enough for me and my _Usa-chan_, how do they manage not to fall off?"

Hunny claimed, sitting on Mori's shoulder. Kyoya, who, being the shadow king, had known all along what was going on, simply pushed his glasses up with a smile (we'll ignore that he is now fishing around for a camera). Tamaki, who first just stared at the sleeping twins, crouched down next to them, looking like a happy father to see his kids doing so well. Haruhi pulled the blanket that had fallen off over the two of them. So she was right, the brotherly love act wasn't all fake.

Oh well. At least they were happy. The idiotic father and ever-so-deceptive mother would protect them along with two strongest martial artists in Japan and a _gariben_ commoner.

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_Tono_, just in case you don't know, is what the twins call Tamaki, the King. _Usa-_chan is the ever-loved stuffed rabbit Hunny always carries around with him. And a _gariben_ is a nerd, a bookworm. Nekozawa-senpai's younger sister, Kirimi called Haruhi that on their first encounber at host club. (Have to say, Kirimi-chan did interpret their characters rather well, didn't she.) 


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